Rain

Empty bowls
Your assignment to fill them
And when I poured blood and gravel in mine
Others found more creative ways and contents

Sometimes one wish themselves right
What would only make them more wrong
I've tried to improve
But ended up being me in the end again

And salt is raining down on me
Stinging my scars
For memories coming alive
To terrify me

Fool me back to old habits
Cheat me into new mistakes
When you cannot shut your ears nor eyes
You have to keep in control

Karuseller

Neddragen i min lya av skit igen
Jag gömmer mig under skrivbordet
Det otrygga skalet
Jag hör msn låta ovanför mig
Folk som försöker kontakta mig
Och om jag kunde ställa mig upp och logga ut
Men det finns för mycket hotande skuggor i ljuset
För lampan är tänd
Ett artificiellt ljus
Som ett fejkat leende
Vill det bränna mitt ansikte
Sticka mina ögon
Och jag andas in frånvaro
Från mitt förnuft och mig själv
Samma distans jag andas ut
Rummet vill snurra
Det vill leka med mig
Som karuseller, men jag blir yr
Jag måste ta kontrollen
Kasta mig ut naken i snön
Utan mask eller filter
Om jag bara kunde ställa mig upp
Men pulvriserade lårben gör ont att stå på
Knäckta vader gör ont att gå på

Naivety

Green eyes watch the scene of lies
Where to rely, where to trust
Stabbed in the back
Blind and naive eyes stare out in confusion

To forgive and forget
Or to walk away
My head is spinning me nausious
Please don't betray

I want to scream my lungs sore
Until my voice fades into a whisper
Scream for myself, scream alone
There's no one else to scream for

Vision

As the new day begins
I've been awake for too long
Watching the ritual
Without a sunrise
No pouring salt
In my eyes nor my soul
Just darkness
And the colour of nothingness
So I rise on my legs
Again I'll stand on them
While they're ready to break
Into two pieces
Again I'll walk on them
Question myself why
When it's so heavy, why?
Because it only matters to try

Again I'll smile
With only my lips
Blind people wouldn't notice
Because you cannot see with eyes
You have to observe with your whole
Your mind and your soul
To see through an opinion of fright
And the tears hiding behind
But it's so much easier
When you don't have to care
About the ones breaking down
Being swallowed by themselves
It's so much easier
To blame on your eyes
And the lack of your knowledge
When your helplessness really mattered

some lines

Strings attached to me
Stung through my skin
To tear me in different directions
To rise the ache within

And today it's too heavy
Way too heavy to manage
The shadows inside of me
Has got a scary advantage

I'll rise again
I'll come through whole
Even though it's broken
I shall try and fix this fucking hole