Just Before I Panic

I don't want to be this fragile
I want to be able to stand up alone
Don't want to be depending
I'd like to make it on my own

And I didn't ask for nights of horror
Coming from inside
I didn't ask for pain
And wounds open wide

I didn't want to be soar
I never wished to get hurt
Why did I deserve panic
To be down in the dirt

And I want to smile for real
Without being high
I want a chanse
And a reason to try

To go on
'til the day that I die
Get away from this darkness
In where I lie

And all the times I shiver
'Cause lack of security
When I don't want to stay
In my fucking reality

And if life's this way
I don't want to live
If I'd ever leave this place
Would you forgive?