Adult Children

I want to lay my head down
Close my eyes
Kick and scream about
How life is so unfair
That I too wanted to be
Seventeen, sixteen
Fourteen, fifteen
That I too wanted to have
A normal childhood
That I too wanted to feel
Safe, loved, wanted
Secure, appreciated
I want to cry for every day
I never could play out my age
Every day I bled
And trembled, disappeared
Fell asleep in the bathroom
To wake up with more anguish
Every day I had to take care of
Problems à la grown up
And swallow my pity
Through my sore throat
Where I try to keep my cries
Held back, they hurt
They yearn for being heard
I have to move on
I'm growing up
And I've missed so much
That I can never regain
So my cries long for taking form
To slip through the wall I built
Just to keep me stronger
Almost like pretending
That they're not there at all
But now I try to look forward
I try to deal the good way
I'll get nowhere from kicking
Screaming, pitying
Blaming, claiming
The things no one can return to me
I'll try my best
To reach my goal
Yet I still cannot stop mourning
My broken childhood