Pills

Eight pills in my pocket
Discreet I count them in my hand
Sliding between my fingers
They run light as sand

How many in a row
Would get me rid of my anxiety
How many in a row
Would get me past this sobriety

And I'm choking
The cries are stuck in my throat
You've got no fucking idea what it feels like
To write your suicidenote

About to give up
About to give in
About to let go
What's crawling within

So damn insecure
And no one cares
You used to be there
I'm running out of prayers

So damn unsure
So damn frail
And no matter what I try to do
I always fail

So damn close to fall
And there's not many more hits I can take
Even if you didn't realize
There's so many times when you made me break

How many in a row
Lays ahead
How many pills in a row
Would make me dead?